Matthew 19.1-12

Let's start off today by reading the passage:

¹ When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan. ² Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
 ³ Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
   ⁴ “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female, ⁵ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? ⁶ So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
 ⁷ “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
 ⁸ Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. ⁹ I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
 ¹⁰ The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
 ¹¹ Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. ¹² For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”


After Jesus gives his fourth sermon, he is immediately met with opposition from the Pharisees. The topic, Divorce. 


Why Divorce?


Amongst the religious leaders, there was a huge debate going on about divorce. Two famous Rabbis, by the names of Hillel and Shammai, disagreed on this topic of what constitutes a man being able to divorce his wife. After these guys died, their disciples carried on this debate. 


Hillel believed that a man could divorce his wife for any and every reason. These reasons where anywhere from not bearing children within ten years, being troublesome, spinning in the public streets, speaking disrespectfully of her in-laws in front of her husband, and even as far as burning his dinner!!! Rabbi Aqiba, a follower of Hillel, said that a man could go so far as to divorce his wife if he found someone prettier than her. 


This was prevalent among the Pharisees. One camp of them, at least, would NEVER commit adultery, but were divorcing their wives for reasons such as the ones listed above. 


But the there camp on the issue of Divorce was that of Shammai's. Shammai's view of divorce is way closer to Jesus compared to Hillel's, but still miles apart. Both Shammai and Jesus said that the only reasons for divorce were marital unfaithfulness, yet there were a number of differences.  Shammai based his view on Divorce from Deuteronomy 24.1-4, which says:


 ¹ If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, ² and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, ³ and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, ⁴ then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.


Jesus based his not on the Mosaic Law, but on CREATION. He quotes Genesis, saying that a man leaves his father and mother and they become united as one flesh, permanently. There is no longer two beings, but one. So what God has joined together, let NO man separate. 


Another big difference is that Shammai only dealt with what was legally permissible for men, but Jesus talked about the Spiritual obligations of both men and women. 


The last big difference is that ONLY Jesus placed restrictions on remarriage, which the Jews would have thought was an absolute right. They are divorcing and remarrying all they wanted to, but Jesus was trying to show the permanency of marriage. 


So many times, when we talk about divorce, the question is always, "On what grounds can I divorce my husband or wife?" If that is our starting question, the battle for marriage has already been lost. That is why Matthew put this conflict directly after Matthew 18.21-25. In that passage, Peter begins by asking Jesus, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"


Isn't this the same kind of question we are asking about divorce? How long to I have to keep working and forgiving this person, what is the point in which I can say, "DIVORCE!!"


But Jesus responds by saying, "not seven times, but seventy-seven times", and then he tells a story about forgiveness. 


This is Matthew and Jesus' point. The way God intended marriage to be, is for life. And at the heart of marriage, is the action of forgiveness. 


And this principle can be taken to every relationship we have. At the foundation of relationships, is forgiveness. Because we are sinful beings, and sin, by definition, hurts yourself and those around you. Yet, when we sinned against God, he did not cut us off, but he forgave us. And we are to do the same.